Instructions for the Ushers

INSTRUCTIONS FOR THE USHERS
by Judith Rivers-Moore
author of "Beautiful Weddings & Events Books

"They didn't tell me," is a popular statement. Well, they may have been told, but print this out and give it to them. If you hear, "The dog ate it" or "It got lost in the washing machine", you will always have a way to give it to them again.

Yes, there are specific obligations for events prior to the big day. Making the appointments for the tux sizing and picking them up is very important. The following are additional items your ushers need to know for the rehearsal and the big day, from their job description to guest-seating etiquette.

CREATE A TIME-LINE FOR THEM:

Date and time, address of the REHEARSAL

Date, time and address of the WEDDING CEREMONY

Date, time and address of the WEDDING RECEPTION

Phone numbers to call if there is an emergency.

INCLUDE A LIST of items they will need: Combs, socks, tux, shirt shoes, ties. Personal items.

TIMING FOR THE BIG DAY

#1. All ushers should be at the location about 45-60 minutes before the ceremony will begin. When they arrive, they need to locate the changing room, get dressed and put on their boutonnieres (if they haven't already). Boutonnieres can be tricky to put on (especially for nervous fingers) so, it's a good idea to have someone there to help them.

#2. Go to the foyer of the ceremony area. Ushers should smile, be friendly, and greet the guests as they escort them to their seats. Traditionally, the usher offers his right arm to the woman (the oldest woman if a group or family is being escorted).Another option for the ushers is to walk the guests to their seats rather than offering their arm.

#3. The first few rows are reserved for the family. After the family is seated, seat people close up to the front and then fill the back. Wheelchairs are always kept on the outer aisles. Guests who are sight-challenged may need an usher to walk ahead of them with the guests hand on their shoulder or arm. Prepare your ushers if this may come up.

#4. Etiquette Rules: Family and friends of the bride are seated on the left side of the aisle (facing the altar) and the groom's family and friends on the right. If one side of the church becomes more full than the other, the ushers should begin seating guests on the other side.

Most couples know how many guests to expect from both sides. The groom or hostess may instruct the groomsmen. If you know one side of the family will have more guests, then instruct your ushers ahead of time to "fill in" the more empty side.

#5. After all the guests are seated, the parents of the groom are seated. Often there is special music played for their entry down the aisle. Sometimes the groom's mother is escorted by the groom.

#7. Following the groom's mother, the mother of the bride is escorted in. She may be escorted by the best man or the head usher.

#8. Brides of Divorced parents often have special seating process. Be sure to instruct the family and ushers ahead of time as to whom should be sitting where everyone should be properly seated (especially when it comes to divorced parents). In these cases, the father is seated in the row behind the mother, or if the parents get along well they can be seated in the same pew.

#9. Once the groom and best man are in place at the altar, the ceremony is ready to begin.

#10. If the attendant is not part of the ceremony wedding party they can come into the audience after most seating's are complete. In case of latecomers, it is wise to keep a person in the foyer to make certain guests no not enter at an inappropriate time in the ceremony.

#11. After the ceremony is completed and the wedding party has recessed, two ushers will escort the mothers back down the aisle. Some mothers prefer to walk back with their husband. In this case, the usher will simply lead the couple out.

#12. Ushers come around the side aisles and then release the guests into the CENTER aisle. Then the ushers will help escort or direct the rest of the guests out of the church beginning with the front pews and working their way back.

#13. NEW trends:

Couples stop with their mothers and fathers to kiss them and shake hands before going back down the aisle.

Some couples go back down the aisle and release each pew after greeting their guests, in lieu of a receiving line.

Let me know if this article has helped you. jr@weddinglinks.com,
Beautiful Weddings & Events Books 800-233-3850